


Abandoned to the Cold

by AnnAisu



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Child Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-09-14
Updated: 2013-02-04
Packaged: 2017-11-14 04:48:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 20,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/511483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnAisu/pseuds/AnnAisu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Trapped at the Dursley's over 6th years winter holidays, Harry stumbles over a snake, abandoned in the cold. Harry manages to sneak the snake inside, whereupon the snake is quickly introduced to the muggles abuse of Harry. Harry names the snake Riddle, as it is both a fan of Tom Riddle and a complex enigma, discovers his unexplored talent for wandless magic, and begins to truly Occlude. Throughout the harsh break, Riddle remains a source of comfort and companionship to the teenage boy.<br/>Riddle: what secrets does this snake hold?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Abandoned to the Cold

**Author's Note:**

> Abandoned to the Cold  
> Authors note: This is my first story, so I would appreciate of Constructive criticism and help, if you would. I would also love any questions or comments you might make, even if it is just as simple “nice.” I have realized I tend to put in many commas and dashes; I apologize, and I am working on that.  
> Disclaimer: No, I do not own any thing, characters included. My ideas were taken from a mesh of many other people, combined, and personalized. From ff.net the story ‘Seeking Warmth’ by BlackenedNightshade helped spark the initial idea.  
> Warning: Possible beating later on. Uncle Vernon is quite the horrid character.  
> Pairings: I have no idea. What happens will happen.  
> This was originally posted on fanfiction.net, and has since been transferred here. Some later edits may be missing, but it is more likely that ff.net will be missing out more!

**1**

~/\~

^-^ Abandoned to the Cold -^-

~\/~

Harry stomped through the streets, fuming at Dumbledore, Voldemort, his friends, his ‘family’, and at the world in general. Why in the name of all that was holy or unholy was he stuck at the Dursley’s? It was not summer. It was not fall, nor even spring. No, it was the middle of stinking December, and was he having a happy, happy holiday indeed.

Dumbledore had decided (without consulting Harry) that he would have to go to the Dursleys.  For Christmas. Alone. With no owls or letters. For. No. Reason.

Well, Dumbledore claimed he had a reason. Supposedly, the blood wards protecting Harry that had been constructed from Lilly’s sacrifice were failing because Harry did not consider Number 4, Privet Drive, his home.  Dumbledore had decided to ‘fix’ that by forcing Harry to spend Christmas break there. Harry knew it would not work. There was no way in the world, heaven, or hell that could get him to consider his personal little hellhole home. Just prison.

Now he was stuck with the Dursleys, and no one would do anything about it. No one cared and no one could come. He had been abandoned by everyone the moment Professor Dumbledore had opened his mouth. They had all just smiled and said, “Dumbledore knows best!” Not one would listen to him, and not even Ron or Hermione had listened to his pleas. No one would owl him, floo him, rescue him, or attempt to call or contact him in any way, shape, or form. Thank you, Dumbledore. Being locked and secluded at my Uncle’s for Christmas is truly going to make me call that prison ‘home’ and then the blood wards will stand strong and Voldemort will never come and kill me. Quite the genius idea, Dumbledore. The only plan that might surpass it is a trip to Saint Mungo’s to check Dumbledore for insanity.

Harry truly hated being left at the Dursleys. With Dumbledore personally delivering him, with his cursed twinkle in his eye, and his assurance that “Harry’s family is allowed to take Harry anywhere and do anything with him, with no fear from the wizarding world,” Harry knew his Christmas break had just been royally screwed over. Without anyone around, the Dursleys would truly make his life a misery and mercilessly abuse him. Harry would have given anything to have someone there with him. Hermione, Ron, Ginny, Luna, Malfoy, Snape, or even Voldemort would help! Harry winced as his scar hurt viciously at the thought of the snake-man.

Harry trod into a nearby park, still grumbling quietly to himself. He was about to put his foot down when he heard a voice hiss _::Do not step on me, imbecile!::_

Harry stopped midstride as his eyes widened. On the ground, in the snow, was a thin, six-foot long snake. It was shivering and shaking uncontrollably, with its head lifted weakly off the ground to look him in the face. The white snake gave a huge shudder, pulling at Harry’s heartstrings and distracting him from his aching scar and bad mood.

 _::Are you all right?::_ Harry hissed at the snake. If it answered no, he knew he would do his best to help it in any way he could. Since he could not fix his own situation, he could try to help this snake with his instead, if needed.

 _::Of course I am not all right, you pathetic idiot! I was thrown into the frigid streets in the middle of the bloody winter, and I am a cold-blooded snake! Oh yes, I am doing just fine here, freezing to my most humiliating death!::_ The snake spat out at him even as a shiver wracked its body again.

Harry blinked. This snake was obviously in a bit of a temper. Understandable, really, since it was slowly approaching its death. _::Would you mind it if I helped you?::_

The snake looked up at Harry and glared at him with blood colored eyes shining darkly against its pure white appearance. Harry tried to stifle a shriek and jumped back, feeling as if the snake’s gaze was as dangerous as Voldemort’s. _::Scared of me, just because I do not look so pretty with my eyes open? I will have you know, I may look deadly and I am, but I am an exceedingly rare snake!::_ It hissed, and opened its mouth threateningly as if to bite Harry, showing dangerous fangs.

 _::S-sorry, you just startled me. Calm down, and if you are cold, I will help you warm up, if you want.::_ Harry could not help it, the snake looked so helpless. Even though it appeared to be dying , it was holding onto its life and its words. This magnificent creature would bow down to nothing and nobody. Harry wondered how long it had been there, and how it could have possibly survived so far. When the snake made no move or response, Harry slowly crouched down and gingerly extended his arm to the snake. _::I promise I won’t hurt you or abandon you if you come with me. I’ll help protect you.::_

 _::Are you seriousss? I can kill you with just a quick bite, and I am tempted to do just that!::_ The snake appeared to want to accept, but it also appeared wary of accepting Harry’s help. It gave a frustrated shiver of annoyance and cold on the ground.

Harry rolled his eyes _. ::Yes, and then we would both die out here. Look, you can change your mind once you are beyond the reach of death. If you stay out here any longer in the cold, you are probably going to end up dead.::_

The snake seemed torn between pride and life. With a frustrated hiss, it slithered towards Harry. _::Fine then, snake-speaker. Get me out of this wretched cold. Maybe I won’t kill you at this moment.::_

Harry rolled his eyes, but he gingerly picked up the snake. _::If you don’t mind, I will hang you over my shoulders like a boa and cover you with my coat.::_ The snake hissed and sighed, and Harry did just as he had said. The snake shivered, then stuck its tail down Harry’s shirt. Harry yelped. _::That’s cold!::_

 _::Deal with it. You are the one who offered help in the first place, now see it through! I need heat, and your body heat will do quite nicely. So suck it up, I am freezing here!::_ The snake wrapped whatever part of its body that had not fit down Harry’s back around his neck, resembling an insanely large, white necklace

Harry laughed softly, aware that the snake could kill him at any moment and take his body heat as his life faded away. _::All right, all right, just don’t choke me, okay?::_ Harry began walking back to his ‘home’. He hated it there, but it was warmer and the snake needed more heat. He walked in silence, before talking to the snake again. _::I am taking you to my ‘home’, my prison, where we will be warmer. I am afraid I will have to warn you, my family completely hates me. You are going to have to hide, and I will pray that they do not immediately beat me tonight. You would probably kill them if they came too close, wouldn’t you? I personally would not mind, but it would most likely break the wards set around the house and thus make my suffering here completely worthless. ::_

The snake unwrapped itself enough so he could rise up and look at Harry face-to-face. _::Wards?::_

 _::Barriers. They are meant to keep me safe and protect me from any random Dark Lords that stray across my path.::_ Harry snorted. _::Aside from muggles, anyone that is not related to me or sharing blood with me will be unable to come across without my conscious and completely willing decision.::_ Harry sighed. _::You will be fine. After all, I am bringing you in voluntarily. While we are on the topic of my protections, I would advise against thinking of killing me inside the house while I am around. My aunt and uncle complain that it causes them no small amount of pain and headaches whenever they attempt to do so, and it has been that way for years. If my blood relatives have that reaction from the wards, I shudder to think at what might happen to you in said situation.::_

The snake stared at him, speechless. Harry could practically feel his shock. After a minute, Harry grew quite concerned. _::Are you all right?::_

 _::Am I all right? Are YOU all right? You just said your family entertains thoughts of killing you and neither your face nor your voice wavered for even one second!  Are you a complete moron? Why do you stay here?::_ The snake seemed furious now, swaying back and forth.

Harry shrugged. _::It keeps me alive.::_

The snake waited for more. When it realized no other explanation was forthcoming, it sighed. _::How am I supposed to kill you now?::_ it hissed softly.

Harry laughed. _::I suppose you will have to stick with me for a while then. After all, if you do not kill me I can help you, right?::_ Harry paused. _::We will be there soon, so please hide and hope for the best.::_

The snake slithered down so that it wrapped Harry’s waist like a belt, before pulling his head back up Harry’s shirt and whispering in his ear. _::I have your back covered for surprise attacks.::_

Harry gave a quiet laugh _.::They mostly stopped that when I was seven and I unconsciously used magic on them all. Surprising an underage wizard with no control on their magical powers in order to do bodily harm is never a good idea. Even the retarded Dursleys were smart enough to figure out that. At least, they did after a few…unpleasant incidents. You had better hide now that we are here. We would not like them to see you now, would we?::_

The snake lowered its serpentine head. _::I can hide my presence magically. They will never see me unless I want them to, and after I bite them, of course.::_

 _::Don’t you mean_ if _you bite them?:_ : Harry whispered before the door opened.

“MUMMY! DADDY! The freak is back!” Dudley had opened the door. The snake let out a low hiss from where it was hidden.

“BOY! ROOM! NOW!” Uncle Vernon yelled from where he lay sprawled out on the sofa. “You had better not set one FOOT outside your room before I come in to deal with you! The MOMENT my show is over, you WILL learn your lesson!”

Harry flinched. “Yes Uncle Vernon,” he muttered before running up the stairs to his room. He opened the door and closed it behind him, then turned to throw himself onto the bed. He lurched to a stop as he realized that the action would have squashed his passenger. He slowly took off his coat and jacket, leaving only a long, ragged, obviously handed down shirt on. It covered him midway to his thighs once he untucked it. He gently pulled the snake off himself and placed it on the bed.

The snake curled up as Harry lay gently down beside it Harry’s hand slowly reached out and began stroking it. The snake hissed and slowly moved closer. Harry felt its slow approach. _::It’s okay. You are still freezing and I am a good heat source. Unlike you, I won’t bite, so you can move closer if you just swallow your pride. It won’t kill you, you know.::_ Harry gave a small smile.

 _::You know, I might still kill you.::_ the snake hissed. Harry shrugged, rolling his shoulders up and down while the snake slowly curled up on his chest.

 _::It would be an ironic death. The “Great Boy-Who-Lived,” the parseltongue who lived through numerous death-defying encounters with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, the most powerful Dark Lord since Grindelwald and possibly centuries before him, was sent home to be safe and subsequently met his death at the fangs of a snake. Oh, that would be a horribly rich irony! The press would have a complete field day with that- Rita would probably claim I talked the snake into biting me so I could commit suicide.::_ Harry snorted. _::If you killed me, I would have to stay as a ghost just to see how everybody responded. Hmmm…now, I am wondering whether I actually want you to kill me or not…::_

 _::You fight the Dark Lord often, then?::_ The snake seemed a little angry, now.

_::Yeah, on average once a year since I turned 11. Why? Do you know him?::_

_::The fool who kept and tried to kill me did. He was constantly afraid that this Dark Lord would come and kill him, so I eventually began rooting for this person. The fool often read the newspaper articles about him aloud, so I listened in and learned about his noble campaign. My fool owner was quite mad; I am exceedingly glad to be rid of him. How did you, a mere child of 16, defeat the decades old greatest wizard who lived?::_ The snake seemed truly curious, raising its head to look at Harry.

Harry could not decide if he should be flattered or angered. _::I must argue with you about some points later-I mean, noble cause? Killing about half of the wizard population? –but I will debate that with another time. He tried to kill me in my first year several times from the back of my DADA- Defense Against the Dark Arts- teachers head. In one of my Quidditch matches, he jinxed my broom to throw me off, but Snape stopped him. Later, he tried to kill me in the Forbidden Forest after I- and Malfoy, the coward- saw him drinking unicorn blood, but a brave centaur named Firenze saved me. At the end of the year, I beat him before he got the Sorcerer’s Stone with the power of my mother’s love.::_ Harry snorted. Mothers love, like no other mother ever died for her child.

 _  
::In my second year, his memory of his 16 year old self that was sealed in a diary, which I later found out was a Horocrux-::_ the snake hissed _::-tried to unleash a basilisk on the school. Not just any basilisk, The Basilisk that originally belonged to Salazar Slytherin! When we realized that his diary was possessing Ginny Weasley- who Malfoy had planted with for personal revenge- she was taken down into the Chamber of Secrets. Being a parseltongue, whether it was naturally or from the cursed bond I share with Voldemort, I was able to go down into the chambers and saved her. Anyways, after I defeated the Basilisk-::_

The snake interrupted, hissing violently. _::WHAT! You defeated the basilisk!? How in the name of all that is holy and unholy did you manage that! The basilisk is the King of Serpents; it would not just lie down and let some young fool defeat it!::_

Harry scowled. _::That would be just plain insulting, if the story was not so unbelievable to begin with. Yes, I defeated the basilisk. After Riddle sent the basilisk after me, saying that he was the greatest wizard who ever lived, I yelled that it was Dumbledore who was truly the greatest wizard.::_ The snake hissed again in anger. _::Yeah, I know better now, but I didn’t back then. Anyways, his Phoenix, Fawkes, came down and brought the old school sorting hat with it. While Riddle was mocking me, Fawkes distracted and blinded the basilisk and I pulled the Sword of Gryffindor out of the Sorting Hat.::_ The snake softly hissed in disbelief. _::The basilisk could still track me with its sense of smell, but I could look at it without a fear of instant death. As the basilisk lunged at me, I stabbed it through the roof of its mouth and speared its brain even as one of its fangs latched off in my arm.::_ Harry pulled back the sleeve of his T-Shirt –it extended past his elbow- to show off his scar. The snake stared at it, cautiously flicking its tongue at the scar. Harry gave a slight, hissing giggle as the snake’s tongue tickled his flesh. _::I would have died, but as Riddle was mocking me, Fawkes cried phoenix tears into my wound, healing me and restoring my strength. As Ginny lay there with her strength draining away, I took the basilisk fang and drove a hole through the diary. Riddle died, as the ink linked out of his diary, the Horocrux. Oh, a Horocrux is the darkest of magics, created by ripping your soul in half and sealing it in an object as you slowly go mad, guaranteed to survive until the Horocrux is destroyed. Ginny returned to life, and Voldemort was defeated again.::_

The snake hissed, anger showing clearly in its eyes. _::H-hey…are you alright? Snake?::_ The snake snapped at him, then slowly lowered its head back onto Harry’s chest.

 _::Sorry,::_ it started slowly, _::I just can’t believe that. You have impeccable luck. There is no other reason you are alive right now.::_

Harry grinned. _::What, my natural talent had nothing to do with it? No, I agree with you. That is why it’s so sickening how the entire wizarding world is relying on me. If they were not so pathetic, I would just abandon them. As it is though, I will never abandon them. I would, and probably will, give up my life for any of them. Voldemort knows this, and he is not afraid to play dirty and use this against me. Any lead he can make, he will take. He proved it last year, and it got my godfather killed.::_ Harry sighed. _::Oh well. Hey, snake- I can’t keep thinking of you as just that. You do have a name, don’t you? Can you tell me?::_

The snake hissed, long and loud. _::I will not use the name my owner gave to me ever again! I would rather be called dirt than have any link remaining with him.::_

Harry looked down at him, shocked at the snakes pride and conviction. _::Alright, then may I give you a name?::_ The snake looked at him carefully, then slowly nodded. _::Based on your attitude, your puzzling yet proud nature, and whom you look up to, I think you should be named Riddle. The Dark Lord Voldemort’s original name was Tom Marvolo Riddle. If you make an anagram of that, it comes out “I am Lord Voldemort.” He doesn’t care for it all too much, so he probably won’t mind you using it. What do you think?::_

The snake stayed silent for a moment, then slowly nodded his head in acceptance. _::I suppose that is a fitting name.::_ Riddle looked as if he was going to say more, but Harry froze when he heard a noise coming from downstairs.

 _::Hide! Quickly! My uncle is coming, and I don’t want you in harm’s way!::_ Shifting quickly, Harry managed to gently lift the snake and stand up, and quickly carried Riddle to a shadowed corner of the room and hid him behind a pile of rags. _::Stay there and stay silent, no matter what, okay?::_ Harry had a panicked look in his eye as he begged Riddle to listen. _::Please, I’m sorry, just please don’t do anything and stay out of the way!::_ The snake sighed, and nodded.

Harry sighed in relief, and backed away slowly. _::Thank you. I promise I’ll make it up later.::_ As the sounds below moved towards the stairs, Harry moved slowly to the door, standing far enough back he wouldn’t be hit if it swung open. It was a wise precaution because just moments later the door swung open with a loud crash. Riddle jumped in his little corner, but Harry had been expecting it and barely flinched.

“Boy! I have told you, you do NOT leave this house! What if the neighbors saw you and your freakishness?!” Vernon screamed at Harry, spittle flying. Harry made no move, knowing it would only enrage his uncle further. He just hung his head as his uncle raged at him, waxing on about how freaky he was and how the Dursleys had taken him in out of the goodness of their hearts. “BOY! Are you even listening?!” Harry flinched as he nodded his head. “Have you learned your lesson this time?!” Harry cringed back and nodded vigorously.

“I don’t think so!” Vernon advanced and Harry cringed back, knowing what was going to happen. Vernon raised his fist and began pummeling Harry. Harry felt the fist hit his skin, crushing his arm with Vernon’s immense weight behind it. As he pulled back, Harry’s arm began to feel the burn of pain coming from the quickly forming bruise. He began slowly, but soon began alternating between kicking and punching. His blows were hard and fierce, and he put so much effort into them he could barely talk. After many agonizing minutes, he began slowing, merely punching the barely standing Harry, but his punches held all the force of a raging rhinoceros herd stampeding through his pain-clouded mind. “We” punch- “have” punch- “To” kick- “Pound” extra hard punch, and a nasty crack- “This lesson” punch- “IN!” Another sickening crack, and Harry was thrown back onto the semi-hard lump he called a bed. He bit off a cry of pain as Vernon snorted and left the room, slamming the door closed behind him. Harry heard him say something about learning his lesson as his vision started to blacken.

Harry groaned, barely managing to hold on and stay conscious. He slowly dragged himself up and began cataloging his injuries. His right arm was at an awkward angle, and blood was seeping out from where the bone broke the skin. Pain was sending white-hot flashes through his mind, killing his thoughts. With great effort, he managed to concentrate. _::Sh--! I can’t believe he actually did that much damage to my wand arm!::_ He gingerly felt at his chest with his left hand, and winced as he realized that some of his ribs had been broken. He sighed, flinching as his chest flamed in agony. _::Can- can you bring me the bandages near you?::_ He asked the snake quietly, his hiss barely louder than a breath. His lungs protested their movement as he breathed harshly, pulling in oxygen and slowly, so very slowly expelling carbon dioxide.

Riddle slowly slid out of his hiding spot. Grabbing some cloths from nearby with his fangs, he moved onto Harry’s bed. He dropped the rags near Harry’s left hand, and surveyed the damage. _::You came here to be safe?::_ His voice was dry, and held a huge amount of incredulous disbelief. Harry gave a weak chuckle, wincing as the movements jarred his chest. He slowly forced his arm bone back into place, biting back a scream and letting out a low whimper. Panting, he bandaged the arm one-handedly as the blood dripped onto his ‘bed.’ After his arm was painstakingly wrapped, he moved onto bandaging his chest.

 _:: It’s not as bad as it looks::_ Harry said weakly. _::I am actually decent at wandless magic now, so I can heal myself easily enough. Just-- give me a minute.::_ Harry closed his eyes and began concentrating on healing his injuries. His bone gradually knit itself back together beneath his flesh. The bleeding slowed, and then stopped, as new skin appeared to cover the wound. Harry sighed with relief as his chest bones repaired themselves and grew stronger. His breathing steadied, so it was no longer harsh panting breaths. Riddle watched silently as Harry let out small, almost inaudible whimpers of pain.

When Harry was done almost twenty minutes later, Riddle breathed out a slow, snaky whistle. :: _I thought you said you were just decent at wandless magic! I’m actually impressed, boy! How did you learn it? I thought Hogwarts didn’t teach wandless and wordless magic!::_

Harry looked at Riddle curiously before replying. _::They don’t. I taught myself, when I was young. The Dursleys never were very…hospitable, so I had to learn quickly or die.::_ Harry shrugged slowly, wincing as he pulled at his still tender chest. _::It’s a sink or swim world out here. I chose to swim. I just did not have the benefit of rafts and other floatation devices other luckier kids have, nor a steadying parent to hold me safe.::_

Riddle let out a quiet laugh. _::No, instead you got a raging riptide and a murderous shark out after your blood.::_

Harry laughed softly with him, trying not to pull the attention of the Dursleys. _::Truly, you have a great amount of wit. If Voldemort knew you were named after him, he might almost feel proud to share his name. That is, if his name ever meant anything to him in the first place. ::_ He quieted for a moment, and then sighed. _:: Thanks for staying put. I just need to pretend that I never recovered for Uncle Vernon’s benefits. He knows I heal fairly quickly, but I never let on exactly how quickly I heal. The bandages help in the healing and hide the extent of the wound from the Dursleys eyes. All they know is they can beat me however much they wish and I won’t die, no matter what they do. Once, Dudley was truly angry with me and let out a flying punch at my throat. I couldn’t dodge, and I very nearly died that day. It was the first true test of my abilities. I managed to reconstruct my throat before I choked to death. Of course, the punishment for my indiscretions became much harsher after that. Once they realized they would have to try very hard to actually kill me and did not have to worry about me accidently dying, the kid gloves came off::_

Riddle watched Harry, and then he moved the unused rags back to the corner where he had found them. As Harry lay back down on his bed, moving slowly so he did not disturb his ribs, the snake moved back up to him, and lay down next to him as they both succumbed to nightmares of harsh treatment and dreams of a more peaceful future.


	2. The Freak and The Protected

Harry woke up quickly at precisely 5:30 in the morning. He began lunging out of bed, but he quickly stopped himself when he realized there was a snake lying next to and partially on him. He slowly sat up instead, gently dislodging the snake. Riddle blinked and raised his head sleepily, awakened by the sudden absence of warmth. He seemed disoriented for a few minutes as Harry waited quietly for him to wake up. When the serpent appeared to be thinking coherently, Harry started talking. _::Good morning. Are you feeling alright today?::_

It took another minute for the snake to respond. _::Oh, just perfectly awake when I should be sleeping. Why are you awake at such an abominable part of the day?::_ Riddle seemed extremely irritated, and he made it quite clear in his hissing.

Harry sighed. _::I need to go make breakfast for my uncle and the rest of his family before he goes to work. It will take a while, so you can just stay in my room and hide until I come back. The sheets should stay warm for a small while, at least until I return.::_ The snake lowered its head and proceeded to go back to sleep as Harry headed downstairs to make breakfast, softly closing his door behind him.

Expertly avoiding the creaky step, Harry went into the kitchen, remembering to favor his right hand as he barely stopped himself from whistling cheerfully. He had someone to talk with! True, it was not Ron or Hermione, but a snake was a hell of a lot better than Snape or Voldemort! Thinking of the man, Harry’s scar gave another vicious throb. It had never really stopped hurting last night, but it had faded in the wake of Vernon’s beating. In the light of morning, the pain had returned with a dull ache, reminiscent of an old bruise. Harry sighed and began making a breakfast fit for a king. This was because Vernon thought of himself as a king in his house. Whatever the reason, the breakfasts Harry made had to be abso-stinking-lutely _perfect_ before he had a chance at earning food.

After breakfast, Harry would normally check the list of chores that was attached to the refrigerator. Aunt Petunia updated the list constantly and screamed at Harry if he did not complete his chores before the sun set. If he did, and did so without complaining or looking ‘shifty’ all day, something he had no control over as his Aunt made up the fact that he was looking at her funny, then he had a good chance of receiving a small portion of whatever he cooked for dinner. When he was lucky and his aunt was in a good mood, he could occasionally earn a small lunch as well. However, this was unlikely to be the case today.

This morning, Vernon would likely be in a horrid mood because Harry had snuck out the night before, so Harry poured all the attention he could into his food. He willed it to be tasty and soothe Vernon’s mood. He felt his magic rise up at his request, and an idea hit him. If Vernon even guessed what Harry was doing, he would be signing his death warrant, but if Harry’s idea worked, he wouldn’t have to worry about another beating.

As Harry worked on the food, he wandlessly willed the food to be tastier and copy the effects of a weak Cheering charm. Hopefully, it would soothe Vernon’s temper, but not so much it would catch the man’s notice. Harry prayed as he completed the cooking and dished out the food. He retreated upstairs as Dudley thundered down, shoving Harry into the wall unnecessarily. Harry felt his newly healed arm buckle under the weight Dudley was shoving onto him- roughly the tonnage of a teenage whale. Harry bit back another scream and went up the stairs, focusing on healing his arm and avoiding his Uncle.

He gently collapsed onto his bed, maneuvering so he avoided Riddle and barely disturbed the bed at all. Riddle noticed anyways, and sluggishly began moving. _::What’s for breakfast?::_

Harry sighed, and sat back up. He responded while re-healing his arm. _::When I go out to do gardening this morning, I will point you out the mice living in our yard. I never killed any mice when I caught them, just moved them aside, so there should be enough to tide you over for a few weeks until I go back to Hogwarts. When we go there, if you are still with me, I will be able to take you into the kitchens and I can get the house elves to help. They love to help, and always shove mountains of food at my friends and me whenever we visit the kitchens, so they’ll probably do the same for you.::_ Harry hesitated. _::I know you are a proud beast, so will you be okay with this? I’m sorry, but you’ll have to catch the food on your own now and later deal with it being brought to you. If you’re okay with that, we had better go outside and start on my chores before Aunt Petunia comes in and starts yelling at me. She isn’t physically abusive, but her tongue is as sharp as a barb. I… try not to listen, but her words worm into my heart, and cut into it from the inside, often laying deeper into my mental scars and tormenting my thoughts….to put it poetically.::_ He tried laughing it off, but even he could hear the pain in his voice, so he stopped.

Harry waited for the snake to absorb this. After a few minutes, Riddle sighed and slithered onto Harry’s outstretched hand. _::I suppose that if you can deal with that, I can deal with the problems with food.::_ Harry grinned, solemn mood forgotten,  and looped Riddle around his neck and chest. He waited until Riddle appeared mostly invisible in his sight.

_::You said the muggles wouldn’t notice you. How do you do that?::_ Harry asked as he walked outside.

Riddle stayed silent until they made it outside. _::I said I was a magical snake. I use one of my natural abilities to disillusion myself- all anyone else can see is whatever is behind me unless I move extremely quickly. Then, I just look like a slight blurring of colors. No one will notice me unless I will so.::_ A snaky sigh was heard, and Riddle shimmered into Harry’s sight. _::I suppose it would be prudent to allow you to see me.::_

Harry grinned as he bent into weeding. _::Sorry it’s so cold out. The mice are over there.::_ Harry stopped working to discreetly point at a small hole in the foundation of the house. _::When you’re done, you can go inside, wait with me, or leave, if you want to.::_ Harry shrugged. _::I would prefer it if you stayed, but I would not presume to tie you down if you wanted to go anywhere::_

Riddle snorted as he went in the direction Harry pointed. _::Really, now. I said I was abandoned- where, exactly, do you expect me to go?::_

Harry laughed. _::I just thought I would offer. This way, I’m not forcing you to do anything.::_

Time passed as Harry worked in the garden. Even though it was winter, there was still plenty to do. He had to shift any snow away from the plants within 3 feet in any direction. He also had to trim the plants, as they were looking rather derelict from being abandoned while he was at school. He had to do all this without any tools or assistance. Soon, he was feeling the cold bite at him through his jacket. It was a slow and painstaking process, and Riddle had caught his mice and was ready to go back inside long before Harry was done. However, Harry had forgotten that the snake could not get back inside before him when he offered to let the snake go back to his room, so Riddle kept Harry company through his outside chores.

Riddle was curious about why Harry helped him, and after a while, asked Harry to explain. Harry paused to shrug before explain. _::How could I not? You were in distress, and in dire need of help. I could offer assistance, so I did. I might pay for it later, but as I will help anyone and anything in need if I can, and sometimes when I think I can’t.::_

Riddle was silent for a few minutes as Harry continued working. _::I can’t really understand that. You said it was a sink or swim world, so why do you try to help?::_

Harry waited for a moment before replying, never pausing in his work. _::Are you saying I shouldn’t? You would be dead now otherwise.::_ Harry’s tone was slightly amused as he gently teased the snake.

The snake hissed out a yell. _::I never said I was ungrateful, I just asked why!::_

Harry realized that the cold was probably not helping the snakes temper any and decided not to get mad at the snake for yelling at him, and instead decided to reply patiently. _::I said it’s a sink or swim world, not a dog-eat-dog world. I play the part of the lifeguard at the beach and try to save anyone I can and offer a helping hand. It saves lives, relationships, and other people from some suffering. At a small, or sometimes not-quite-so-small, cost to myself, I can help others. My heart just would not let me do anything else.::_ Harry shrugged. _::Hermione, one of my best friends and a real bookworm, says I have a saving people thing. She both admires and pities me for it, I think. I do know that if more people had my attitude, then maybe there would be no need for such extreme attitudes in the first place.::_

_::But what if there were people who don’t deserve saving? Say, for example, your so-called ‘family?’::_ Riddle seemed extremely thoughtful after asking this, and waited intently for Harry’s answer.

Harry took a few minutes to think about it, warring with himself. He fought his hatred until he felt he could make an unbiased decision. _::They have earned retribution. They should be punished for their cruelty, but they should be judged fairly. Once they have paid a penance for their transgressions, they should be given a chance, with no help.::_

Riddle seemed annoyed by the answer. _::What would you suggest their punishment be?::_ He could barely contain himself, and he was wriggling in place while he waited for Harry’s answer.

Harry had to stop for a minute to calm the writhing snake, gently laying a hand on its head until it stopped. While he did this, he was thinking frantically. _::I would…would..::_

Riddle calmed slightly, covering his tension, but just barely. _::If they could pay anything for their crimes, death or torture, what would you have them pay?::_

Harry couldn’t talk for a moment. Then he let out a heavy sigh and leaned back. _::I guess I would-::_ As Harry took a breath to say something, Dudley threw open the door. Harry flinched back to his work with a low hiss. _::Hide! Get off of me!::_

Riddle was clearly angered as he slithered off Harry, muttering foul obscenities under his breath. Harry was almost impressed out of his terror, and committed many of the phrases to memory. Even distracted as he was by the snake, he could not stop the shivers that just barely made his hands tremble as Dudley approached. He knew this was not going to be a pleasant discussion with his cousin.

Dudley waddled closer, a disgusting look of cruelty disgracing his fat face. “Poor little Harry. Stuck out in the cold, with no food or water. Oh wait!” Dudley paused and looked dramatically around. “There is water! Lucky you, Potter! I know how thirsty you were! But snow isn’t good enough for you like this, is it?” Dudley sneered, and a very nasty thought crossed his mind and made itself known on his face. “Just wait, Potter. I’ll bring you something that suits your tastes.” Dudley gave out a laugh.

Harry shuddered. Knowing how sick Dudley was, he had a few guesses as to what he was going to do this time. He managed to stay calm and silent while Dudley went inside and grabbed a large mixing bowl. He brought it back outside, and began haphazardly filling it with snow, making sure every other handful hit Harry and the bushes. Harry shivered as cold snow dripped down his back.

Dudley finally filled the container and brought it back inside. Harry quietly kept working as he waited for Dudley to return. He always did. He was the whale of cruelty, like his father was the walrus of violence and his mother was the horse of guilt. All three warred to cause Harry the most pain. He honestly was not sure which was the winner at the moment, but he felt that it might be Vernon after the broken wand arm incident. He did not know what Dudley had for him yet, though.  For all Harry knew, it could be despicable enough to place him at the temporary top for the day.

Voldemort had once been on his list of top torturers, but he had been thrown off the summer after his return. Occasionally during the school year, someone else would surface to the top of the list, but the Dursleys always returned to the top in the end. Once Dumbledore had hit the top, and so had a number of other people. Malfoy mini, Lockhart, Wormtail,  the Goblet of Fire, Umbridge, Snape, Bellatrix, and once again Dumbledore. Now however, was the Dursley’s time again.

Harry did not look up as Dudley reappeared, remembering a lesson he had been painfully taught years ago. He waited until Dudley handed him the large mixing bowl, a look of sick satisfaction spreading across his features. He looked at the bowl filled with yellow snow and ranked it on his list. Nope, Vernon was still at the top. Sorry Dudley, you failed this round, better luck next time.

Dudley sneered. “Aren’t I just the best! I saw you suffering, and out of the goodness of my heart-” Harry struggled to think of any time that suggested Dudley actually possessed a heart and failed- “and brought you some flavored water! See how nice I am! Drink up now, Mummy wants her bowl back in less than a minute.” Dudley’s face twisted at the end into a malicious grin, and Harry got the message. Drink the bowl of water and-Harry struggled not to think of what else was in there turning the snow yellow-in less than a minute.

Harry wordlessly complied, choking down the snow, persuading himself that this was training for drinking Snape’s potions. Strangely, it worked and he convinced himself to wash it down quickly. Success! No more nasty Dudley potions for him today. Harry wondered as he passed the bowl back to Dudley if that or Snape’s potions were worse. He found himself distracted as he returned to work and Dudley swaggered off to the kitchen, threatening Harry all the while. He paid it no mind, as it made no difference if he was listening or not.

Riddle looked repulsed as he watched the scene, revulsion forcing him to gag and suppress the urge to vomit, if snakes could do such a thing. Harry glanced up and saw this as Riddle returned to him and smiled, faintly amused.

Once Dudley had been inside for more than a minute, Harry turned to the closest batch of untouched snow and rinsed his mouth out. He felt a biting cold as the snow hit an untreated cavity but paid it no heed, just glad to be rid of any reminder of what just happened.

Riddle stayed quiet as Harry finished his work, sensing the opportunity to talk to Harry about a suitable punishment for his ‘guardians’ had passed. He sighed at the lost opportunity and managed not to question Harry on what happened until later.

Harry finished his gardening around noon and went upstairs to nurse his blue fingers back to life. He thanked every deity he knew once again for magic. His discovery in the morning had prompted a thought, and he realized he had done wandless magic without a sound or (obviously) a wand. He had tried the same thing while gardening to place a warming charm on himself. It had taken a few hours to get it right before he discovered it was the intent and not the words that focused the magic. He had managed it far more easily when he avoided the incantation and focused on warming his outer layer of clothes and trapping the heat. It had taken many tries, but he managed to make the warmth stick for periods of time without catching on fire. It had happened once, and he had quickly thrown snow on his coat, oblivious to Riddle’s confused gaze.

He made it up into his room without grinning while avoiding his relatives. He had a way to make everything easier and get away with magic without his family or the ministry knowing! Well, no owls had arrived, so he assumed the ministry did not know.

When he closed the door to his room and let out his grin, Riddle was tired of not asking any questions. _::Well? Are you just going to stand there grinning like a buffoon or will you tell me what’s made you so happy?”_

Harry took notice to the snake’s mild insult. He was too thrilled with his discovery. _::I figured it out! I can do magic!::_

Riddle looked at him as if he was crazy. _::Of course you can do magic, you’re the bloody-boy-who-lived! Did whatever you drink earlier-::_ he shuddered _::-make you an idiot?_

Harry just kept grinning. _::I figured out how to do wandless magic! Feel my shirt, it’s warm! I did a wordless, wandless heating charm on it!::_ He placed both his shirt and snake on the bed, letting Riddle feel for himself. Riddle was staring at the shirt waiting for the heat to fade, and never looked towards Harry as he changed into a dry pair of clothes as badly fitting as the ones he just took off.

After a few minutes of waiting and staring and the shirt not cooling, Riddle realized he was correct. _::I am impressed! I knew you had talent when you healed yourself, but this is something else! Wandless and wordless, you said?::_

Harry grinned and lay on the bed as the snake managed to slither under the shirt to keep warm. _::Yeah, it’s amazing, isn’t it! Wordless magic is really hard, and having a good grip on wandless magic makes you a legend! I accidentally used it this morning on my uncle’s food, and I realized it was like what I do when I heal, so I tried it outside, and it worked!!::_ Harry lay basking in his achievements for a while and the snake pondered.

After a few minutes, Harry’s expression turned into horror. _::Crap! I need to go work on my other chores right NOW. You can come if you want, which I do not suggest, or stay here, but decide QUICKLY! I must close my door so once you make your decision you’re stuck for the afternoon until night. Hurry, I need to start before my aunt notices!::_

As an answer, Riddle turned invisible for a second before letting Harry see him, then climbed under Harry’s sleeve, and once again hid himself by wrapping himself around Harry’s chest, letting his head out to see what was going on. Harry gave it a quick grin, then soundlessly left the room, closed the door, dashed downstairs, and began cooking lunch.

He finished the meal to perfection and began on the other housework as the Dursley’s pigged out on their meal. As he methodically cleaned the house, he ignored their snuffling as they ate, and then their taunting as they finished. Every once in a while, Riddle whispered in his ear, amusing him as he cleaned the Dursley’s pigsty and soothing his temper, keeping from yelling at the Dursley’s.

Once they began mentioning his parents, Harry tensed up. Riddle noticed and stayed silent for a moment, curious as to what the Dursley’s would stay. He decided that was not a good idea when Harry began shaking and radiating anger. He hissed soothingly into Harry’s ear, calming him. Harry was still breathing deeply when he began cooking supper. His hands shook, and he nearly sliced his hand numerous times as he prepared the food.

He thought fiercely to himself as he worked. The animals, daring to put down those who had lain down their life for him! Guilt washed over him, unhelped by cutting comments from Petunia about how her pathetic sister could not do anything right, making a friend with a half-blooded prince and then losing his friendship, getting his father killed, getting herself killed, landing them with a baby which they had so selflessly, so kindheartedly taken in despite their wish to be rid of his entire freakish world! Harry wondered through his growing rage why his magic had not popped out and manifested his anger, as it was liable to do at the Dursley’s.

He distracted himself by mentally mocking his aunt’s words. They had a heart? A kind heart? Harry decided that if they had a heart, his aunt had a shriveled prune in its place with barely enough warmth to pump her bitter blood through her body and fuel her tongue. His uncle would have a red, angry chili pepper that would occasionally loan its color to his face. But then, Harry wondered, where did the magenta color come from? It was a color that graced his uncle’s face, loaning hilarity at the look itself and terror for what the look meant. His cousin had a heart of…Harry took a few minutes to come up with something fitting for Dudley while he dusted the mantelpiece.

Harry was still pondering as he began making their, and hopefully his as well, supper but he could not come up with anything. Rust? No, that came from something useful. Then again, Dudley had punches of steel and he had been weathered from life. His mothers doting had caused him weakness, and led him to be the pathetic lump he was today. Yes, Harry decided, Dudley had a heart of rust, barely held together.

Harry set the table for three and looked at his aunts feet when she entered the dining room. After a minute of thinking, (Harry winced for the poor, unused organ) she finally gave permission for Harry to eat. He thanked her graciously, and under her suspicious gaze (would it ever change?) took his food upstairs into his room. He made a quick trip to the loo before his uncle made it upstairs to lock him in.

Harry ate his food slowly, savoring every bite. Unlike fourth year, no one was supplying him with food, so he had to make do with what he had and make it last. Harry finished his food all too soon, and turned to talking with Riddle. He quickly discovered that Riddle had a wicked sense of humor, a sharp tongue, and quick wit. Harry discussed simple things with him for a while before broaching the subject with his family.

_::I hate them,::_ he hissed, forcing Riddle to flinch back at the vehemence in his words. _::I loathe my family, my caretakers, the ones who are supposed to shelter me with every fiber of my being. There is not one being on the face of the Earth that could top their cruelty. True, none of them sold me to…pleasure others, but they have done worse without physical evidence. Truthfully, I think it was only a matter of time before Vernon got the idea, but he hasn’t yet, and I pray he never will. They cause me pain, every day they ridicule me, beat me, and try to humiliate me. Their excuse? They are trying to beat the magic out of me! Can you believe it?::_ Harry cried and buried his head in his flat pillow. _::They pass off their cruelty as a favor! To get rid of the one good thing in my life! The ONLY thing in this messed up life of mine worth living for!::_

Harry cried, and cried, pouring out his emotions without letting another sound escape. Riddle warily stayed out of his way, hissing softly to reassure him. Harry sniffed a few times, before he realized what he had just done.

_::I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to break down.::_ Harry let out a shake laugh, feeling like a fool. _::Listen to me, I’m pathetic! It’s true what they say, I really am a waste of space! Look at me!::_ Harry rose from the bed and slowly changed into his pajamas. This time, Riddle saw what was hidden under his shirt and bit back an enraged hiss.

FREAK.

Scars were cut into Harry’s skin, spanning his chest and engraving the damning word. FREAK. Never would Harry be able to forget what he was, for the one thing he loved in his life. For his magic, he was forever destined to be a freak, a waste of space, a unnatural thing in a normal home. Harry looked down at his chest and shuddered in revulsion. Freak. Freak. Freak. Freak. It pound in his head.

Freak. Unnatural. Freak. Weird. Freak. Abomination. Freak. Nature gone wrong. Freak. Creepy. Freak. Abnormal. Freak. Malformed. Freak. Monster. Freak. Demon. Freak. Freak. FREAK!!!

The words were buried deep in Harry’s mind, body, and soul. He was unloved, a freak, and nobody had ever proven him wrong. _::Freak::_ Harry whispered, silent tears once more streaming down his face. _::That is all I am, and all I will ever be, a freak.::_ He gave a bitter laugh. _::I’m a freak, no matter what! Look, I’m even a freak in magic!::_ Harry felt angry, and his stuff was flying around the the room. _::Look, see::_ He asked, staring straight at Riddle, who was watching the display with hooded eyes. _::I can do things no one else can! I can regenerate my throat, mend a broken bone, attract the enmity of the wizarding world, gain the respect of the wizarding world, then proceed to lose and gain their trust again and again! I can be an ingredient in a ritual to bring back someone who will kill someone, I can be a tool of prophecy, I can be a pawn, I can banish the Dark Lord at birth!::_ Harry let out a laugh, maniacal and suicidal.

_::He-hey! Stop! Don’t kill us! Be careful!::_ Riddle hissed , growing extremely worried. Various sharp object were now floating around the room, doing a cruel parody of a dance. A particularly sharp eagle quill with an abnormally large point was floating near his head, with a potions knife with a wicked edge neared Harry. _::Idiot! Calm down and listen to yourself!::_

Harry said no more, but the objects carried on with their movements, cavorting around the room. _::You may be many things, but you’re not all that! You’re just made of sheer, dumb luck!::_ Riddle frantically cast for words to stop Harry from killing them both. _::The wizarding world is full of idiots! Your no freak, they’re just stupid! You are incredibly talented in the wandless arts, a monumental blessing! You should be honored to be needed to revive the most powerful wizard! You are no more a freak than-than-than…Albus Dumbledore a nice grandfather with only your best interests in mind, and that stupid muggleborn you’re with stupid!::_

The objects had slowed at Riddle’s words, and the rage in Harry’s eyes had died down. When he mentioned Dumbledore and Hermione, Harry began smiling. It was a small smile, nothing big, but it showed that Riddle had broken through into his thick skull. _::Yeah…yeah, thanks. I don’t really believe you, but Dumbledore a kind grandfather? He’s an manipulative old coot! Hermione, the muggleborn, stupid? Hell would freeze over before anyone could claim her stupid! She has earned grudging respect from EVERYBODY!::_ Pride for his friend shone out in Harry’s voice, his anger forgotten. _::She truly has respect from literally EVERYBODY but the stupidest of the crowd! Even her enemies acknowledge it! Ron, Professor McGonagall, Professor Snape, Malfoy-mini, Malfoy-major-pain-in-the-butt, and heck, even Voldemort recognizes her! Apparently, so do crazy people and brilliant snakes!::_ Harry grinned.

_::Thank you. I really am sorry for blowing up on you. Really though, it’s a good thing you’re here! I feel like a broken pressure cooker, and the steam has been building up for long enough for me to explode! You helped me make it through the day, and kept me from blowing up the others, and maybe kept me from suicide tonight. I hate op say, but it really was a kinda close thing. You know, I don’t know why, but I feel I can trust you and tell you everything. I don’t know why; I never tell my friends that much. Something in me just says that you will be there, at least for a little while when I need it.::_ Seeing the snake’s incredulous look, Harry looked into its blood-red eyes. _::I promise I will let you go, but until you leave me, I will protect you. Just now, you saved me. For that, I WILL protect you.::_

Harry grinned, broke eye contact, and lay down. _::Listen to me, being all sentimental tonight! I blame you, Riddle! As punishment, you must not leave until I have a way to keep you safe!::_ Harry quieted, and prepared to go to sleep. _::All joking aside though, I really will protect you. I will protect you, as you just protected me. Sleep well, Riddle.::_ Harry turned over on his bed and went to sleep, all thoughts of suicide banished temporarily, feeling slightly foolish for his declaration, but knowing every word he spoke was true. He felt from the bottom of his heart that the snake would not let anything happen to him, at least for a while. Safe and content, he drifted off into a more peaceful slumber than he had had since Voldemort was resurrected.

Many hours passed while the snake contemplated before he too fell asleep, comforted by the protection Potter had pledged him.


	3. Meditation and Sanity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knew Occlusion was this simple?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note: This is my first story, so I would appreciate lots of Constructive criticism and help, if you would. I would also love any questions or comments you might make, even if it's just as simple "nice."  
> Disclaimer: No, I do not own any thing, characters included. My ideas were taken from a mesh of many other people, combined, and personalized.  
> Warning: Possible beating later on. Uncle Vernon is quite the horrid character.

** Abandoned to the Cold **

**3**

~\/~

^-^ Meditation and Sanity -^-

~/\~

At 5:30 the next morning, Harry awoke from a dreamless sleep, for which he was extremely thankful. Too many times had his sleep been burdened by nightmares of Voldemort, Cedric, Sirius, and all the others he had seen die through Voldemort’s mind. He realized that Riddle had ended up sleeping across him again. He may have felt protected when the snake was awake, but he knew better than to startle it from its slumber. He gently shifted out from under it, being careful to keep from waking it.

Once he finally made it off his bed, he went downstairs to cook for the Dursleys. He figured that since Riddle was a slow at waking, it would be safe to leave him upstairs while he cooked. He was careful to avoid the creaky stair and proceeded to the kitchen. He was debating trying to charm the meal again. Could he do it? There would be more pros than cons if it worked unless the Dursley’s found out, but would it work? For all his expertise with wand magic –almost none- he had no idea if he could successfully spell the food.

Harry sighed deeply while pulling out eggs, bacon, and bread. He would try it, As he mixed the eggs with ham and cheese, he _willed_ for it to soothe the Dursleys temper, but not too much. He _felt_ a small tendril of magic tentatively leak out and leak into the food, and slowly, ever so slowly, the tentative link thickened, then broke off. Harry gave a grin. He had found a get-out-of-beatings-today-free card! IF it worked like it did yesterday, it could improve their moods enough they would only do the barest cruelties to him for at least most of the day.

Harry looked back on yesterday and blessed his discoveries. He didn’t know how much pain he had saved himself, but he knew it was a lot more than a little. He did know that without Riddle he would have been sorely tempted to blow up the Dursleys. Or worse, considering what they were saying. He shuddered and felt himself grow angry at what they said yesterday. Harry slowly began his meditating techniques.

Ever since his godfather had died, his temper was not to be envied, even if he had any rein on it at all. He was ready to snap at a single phrase. He had finally lost it one day in Grimmuald Place and stormed out. (Really, what had they been thinking, bringing him back there? Obviously nothing.) He had walked to a different section of town, leaving flustered Order members behind. While there, he had come across a store and wandered in. It wasn’t as if he had anything else to do. Inside had been-books. It was a bookstore. Out of idle curiosity, (his anger forgotten with the discovery) he had picked up a book on meditation. It said it was an ancient way to calm the mind and clear the senses. It uncomfortably reminded Harry of Occlumency, but he bought it anyway. He stayed in a nearby park, and practiced the first exercise, breathing. In and out. It sounded stupid, but it was not Snape saying it (if he had ever said anything), so he tried it. To his great surprise, it helped him get a grip on his mood. Ever since then, Harry had studied the book and could easily reach a relaxed state, (unless he completely forgot about it, as he was apt to do with the Dursleys and had yesterday).

Harry focused on meditating, cooking, and soothing the Dursley’s mood. As he finished the meal, laying it out on the table, he realized he could see a slight shimmer around the food. It broke his meditation and he couldn’t see it anymore. Frowning, he brought his mind back to the state of peace meditating brought. The shimmering reappeared. Focusing on the shimmer and meditation, he made a mental note to figure it out later. Shrugging it off, Harry turned and made his way upstairs, nimbly avoiding Dudley. Yes, he had healed his arm, yes Dudley had hit it again, but no, he did not want to injure it again. He grimaced and made it back into his room.

Upon seeing the snake awake, Harry began hissing. _::Good morning, Riddle. Sorry for not taking you with me, but I noticed yesterday that you didn’t like mornings. Seeing as I knew I would be back up here within an hour, I decided to leave you on my warm bed rather than bore you with cooking. Speaking of cooking, I managed to spell the Dursley’s food again. Maybe today they will stay in a good mood like yesterday!::_

Riddle remained quiet throughout Harry’s explanation, but sighed as he heard the conclusion. _::Yesterday was a good mood? I keep feeling less and less inclined to kill you with every speck of new information you give me. You should be glad, because I am completely serious when I contemplate killing you.::_

Harry shrugged. _::And I was completely serious when I contemplated letting you. All joking aside, I have been thinking about suicide, and this wouldn’t be a bad way to go. However, before I can off myself, if I do, I have things to take care of first. Dumbledore, Voldemort::_ Harry winced at the pain and almost clapped a hand to his forehead but continued without pausing, _::and Bellatrix, of course. That insane lunatic is to blame for killing my godfather.::_ Harry felt his temper grow and breathing quicken. He inhaled sharply. _::Hang on for a moment. I need to meditate before I lose my temper and trash my room.::_

Riddle waited with a curious gaze as Harry closed his eyes and began breathing slowly. Eventually, the tenseness that was ever prevalent lessened and his frame relaxed. You could see the difference as his mind calmed. Riddle whistled slowly, impressed. _::I didn’t know you knew Occlumency!::_ When Riddle said that, Harry instantly tensed up again. Every inch of Harry instantly screamed “anger.”

_::Occlumency? THIS is meditation! None of that clear your mind” no instruction crap! I hate Occlumency! Every time somebody mentions Occlumency, I get flashbacks it was so terrible. I see the damn lessons with Snape, shouting clear your mind and then immediately ramming through and forcing me to relive memories as I desperately try to block out the worst of the Dursleys! Do you know how hard it was? Going from only knowing that I was going to have lessons with Snape and waiting outside the door for my first lesson, and then not even five minutes later I was invaded for the first time! Not a word of instruction passed his lips! The absolute most he explained was “clear your mind!” How the hell was I supposed to do that while he was forcing me to block my worst memories and dragging me through the others? I would say he deserved me falling into his Pensieve. At least I told no living soul about my lessons, and I’m almost completely sure he reported back to his master. I still think he was purposefully broke my mental barriers.::_

The snake froze. _::You have got to be kidding.::_ Harry shook his head. _::Exaggerating?::_ Harry shook his head. _::That was exactly what happened?::_ Harry nodded. _::Did you try to find any books?::_

Harry nodded, and shook in frustration and anger. _::Every last one, of the few that we had, were checked out! From the Forbidden Section! It’s a fact one of the professors took it out, but exactly who took it is information that is not allowed to be divulged. Guess what that means? Someone took the books and didn’t want me to know? That’s not all either, the books are still out!::_

Riddle was shocked. _::Well, it’s clear somebody wanted you to fail Occlumency horribly! By horribly, I mean absolutely and completely! There is no possible way to keep anybody out or learn any Occlumency like that! Wait- they saw this and you are still here?::_

Harry grinned. _::No. All Snape saw was my cupboard, an aunt with a ripper of a dog, and some minor verbal abuse. Oh, I think he saw flashes of some chores too. Other than that, I’m pretty sure I hid most of my home life. Ha, as if I was going to let that Death Eater see my greatest shame. He ridicules me enough already, why provide him with more ammo?::_ Harry sneered. _::‘Insolent brat! You’re  as arrogant as your father, always thinking your exempt from the rules. You stride around like you own the place, a pampered little prince!’Does that sound like someone who could possibly understand?::_

Riddle shook his head. _::You should not have been able to Occlude, yet you did!::_

Harry shrugged. _::I tried to hide the memories. Whenever he got really close, I nudged another, tantalizing memory just into his view. I made sure he saw it, then put up a small struggle before giving it up. I didn’t want him to think I was giving it to him. Of course, he took many memories I didn’t want him to see, but none of the memories I couldn’t allow him to see. I could not afford to let him see them, so I didn’t let him see them. I just focused on other stuff.::_ Harry shrugged again. _::That’s all.::_ He really didn’t see what the big deal was.

Riddles eyes were bugging out at this point. _::Th-that’s all? That is Occluding! The way you say it it sounds like where it is truly necessary, you have Occlumency learned and mastered! Not many can successfully distract others while the other is already in your mind.::_

Harry just shrugged again. _::He wanted the memories, so I made him think he stole them, that’s all. I made it look like forbidden knowledge and he jumped on it. Anyways, what do you mean my meditating was Occluding?::_

Riddle sighed. Whether it was in disbelief or awe, Harry didn’t know. _::You really know nothing about Occlumency, do you? Meditating is the essence and the first main step of Occlumency. Once you clear your mind, it is harder for anyone to find anything for the Legilimins to latch onto. With meditation, it is easier to control your emotions thus easier to banish the Legilimins. Sheesh, the books my old paranoid owner bought went in much more detail than your so-called professor.::_

Harry laughed. _::I learned more about Occlumency in one session of casual conversation with a snake than a half-year worth of lessons with my snarky professor.::_ Harry froze up as he heard noises from downstairs. _::Crap crap crap! Coming or staying? I have chores to do! All are inside today.::_

Riddle sighed, turned invisible to all but Harry, and crawled up his arm. _::You are still much warmer than an empty room.::_ The moment Riddle was curled around Harry, he leapt out the door and downstairs. There, he endured a scolding from Aunt Petunia and was told to paint Dudley’s room while they went out Christmas shopping. Harry readily agreed, and after an insulting scolding to leave everything alone, the Dursleys left.

Harry groaned. _::I hate this chore. I need to take everything in Dudley’s room, make sure it’s out of the paints way, clear the shelves, and cover the shelves. Then I must spread an even layer of paint on the wall, wait for it to dry, then do it again. After it’s all finished, I need to put Dudley’s room back together and clean up for him. So it’s a double task in one, and I need to have it done before Dudley gets home and ruins my work.::_

Riddle sighed. _::Do I want to know if he messes up the paint deliberately or not?::_ His tone was dry and Harry let out a wry grin.

 _::Probably not, but I’ll tell you anyways. As you most likely guessed, he purposefully does it. Do you know how to get blood off fresh paint? I do, and it’s my blood I have to try to scrape off the walls. If the paint is wet and comes off with the blood, I have to repaint over it the next day. Once I’m done with that, they test it the next night to see if the paint dried smoothly and if I scrub hard enough. If I pass both “tests,” the blood will eventually come off. Every time I fail either test, I have to do it all over again. I hate it. The only good thing is they leave me alone while I do it. Apparently, the fumes hurt Aunt Petunia’s senses and destroy more brain cells than my uncle and cousin can afford.::_ Harry stopped at the door. _::Get ready to see-::_  Harry opened the door and bowed, flourishing grandly in the air, _::-Dudley’s room.::_ Harry rose from the bow and began cleaning and moving stuff, leaving the snake to suffer shock in silence.

_::This is…….argh! This is exactly why Lord Voldemort wants to kill all muggles! Look at this! A huge room lavishly furnished! Toys everywhere! Expensive crap as far as the eye can see! Yet you live one room over where broken things grace broken shelves, while you curl up on a broken bed with a threadbare blanket! Unbelievable! Stupid filthy muggles!::_

Harry paused and pretended to take offense. _::Hey, don’t knock my bed! It’s very nice, four posters, canopy, soft as heaven mattress, the works! Well, okay, not really, but it really isn’t a bad bed. Bad blanket, yes, bad room, yes. Bad bed, no. I only come back in the summer anyways, and I don’t need the blanket then.::_ Harry folded the bed as he picked old wrappers up off of it.

_::Why don’t they give you a better blanket right now?::_

_::Honestly? I think they forgot. They aren’t intelligent enough to take away my stuff as punishment, unless it’s food.::_ Harry sighed. _::Speaking of food, I’m not supposed to get any food today, because there is supposedly no way to know if I do my work or not. The next day, if I did my work well, I get lunch and supper. If I steal some food the day before, then that’s a really good deal. Half of the time I do steal, half the time I don’t.::_ Harry began taking the stuff off the shelves. _::I don’t want the Dursley’s to realize I’m taking their food.::_ Harry shivered all over, feeling cold at the thought. _::I don’t think it would ever happen, but if they caught me…::_ Harry shivered again. _::I get the feeling they could make your Lord Voldemort’s torture look easy.::_ Harry flinched. _::I  honestly believe they could rival him. They are the evil of the muggle world.::_

Riddle started hissing. _::You think these stupid muggles can equal the Dark Lord’s torture?! You don’t know-::_

Harry cut him off. _::Yes I know. I know every damning thing he does when he is in a temper. I can see it. When he is truly angry, or feeling any emotion strongly, I’m brought to his mind. I can feel his thoughts, his emotions, and his pain. I watch as his most loyal are tortured, I watch when new recruits are tortured, I watch when his prisoners are tortured, and I watch as he rewards his favorites.::_ Harry shuddered. He did _not_ need to see what he did then. No need for a sex-ed class for Harry Potter, he saw it all through everyone’s favorite Dark Lord’s mind. _::I watch as he plots, I watch as he fights, I watch and I cry and I try to stop him or escape but I’m forced to watch and watch and watch!::_ Harry pounded his fist against the wall. All of the shelves that still had stuff on it a moment ago did no longer. It was flying off the shelves, or more specifically, away from Harry. He fell to the floor, crying. _::I watched, as he tortured over and over again. And yes, I still think the Dursleys can do worse. Chains; check. Torturous living space the size of a cupboard; check. Whip; check. Lack of care; check. Desire to torture, kill, and maim; check. Lack of humanity; check. What am I missing? Oh yeah, intense hate and loathing for one Harry Potter; double-check.::_

Riddle said nothing as Harry covered the shelves. He stayed silent even as Harry began painting, gently stroking the brush across the wall. Harry was done with the first layer before he said anything. Harry lay down on the floor to wait as the paint dried. What was the snake thinking?  Did he think Harry deserves it for stopping the Dark Lord and killing the King of Serpents? Did he think he deserves some retribution, but not that much? More? Does he pity me? Hate me? Or should I entertain the idea hiding at the back of my mind I can’t quite think of? Harry didn’t know what the idea is, but something was telling him to observe Riddle carefully. Looking at him, Harry could see why. Who trusts a random, 6-foot snake? With his white scales and blood red eyes, he gave out a terrifying visage. What told Harry he could trust him? Well, for one he had been freezing in the cold in the dead of winter. For two, he had done nothing but listen to Harry and help him since he had arrived. His family owed him for helping calm Harry down and not blowing them up. Harry pondered as he waited and the snake stayed quiet.

 _::Oh. Well, I guess that explains a lot. Like why you try to kill the Dark Lord.::_ The snake finally spoke.

Harry gave a hollow laugh. _::I try, and I hate it. It’s the only reason I put up with Dumbledore’s manipulations. I have to save my friends, the other muggleborn, and the muggles.::_

_::Why. Why do you feel obligated to save the people who wrong you?::_

Harry sighed. _::There are so many reasons. I just told you one. I need to finish the job. I need to fill some prophecy or other, whatever the stupid thing is. I have to save the muggles.::_

Riddle broke _in, hissing. ::Why? Why save the muggles? You are seeing what they can do. You are_ living _in what they can do! They are pathetic apes filled with cruelty and weakness. They are filth filling our world, a barbaric species incapable of using magic properly and understanding it! Why are you expanding any effort to save them?::_

Harry looked at Riddle oddly. _::Are you judging the world based on a few peoples actions? Yes, these muggles hate me. No other muggles I know, aside from Dudley’s gang, truly hate me. They dislike the image Petunia gives them-seriously, who wouldn’t be worried by a hardened killer child?- but they are actually very nice. Even as they are scared, they try to help. A teacher at my school helped me through my home life once he found out, though I wouldn’t let him tell anybody or do anything. I watched as he gave up his life to save a child from drowning.::_ Harry shivered, remembering his fear. _::Before he could help me, he gave his life for me.::_ Harry saw in his mind the field trip he took with his school, the running from Dudley to his teacher, the accusations, the throwing him in the water, his teacher jumping in to save him, the other teachers standing around as he tried to fight them and his exhausted body to save his teacher, and he saw himself failing. _::He- he was af-fr-fraid of water.::_ Harry shook. _::He was afraid of water, yet he just jumped and gave his life for me. He gave up his entire life at a minutes’ notice, just for me.::_ Harry started yelling. _::Can you just lay there and say the man who lay down his life for me was dirt? If you can, I suggest you HOLD YOUR TONGUE!!!::_

Riddle wisely kept quiet. Harry fumed. Red was covering his vision, and he saw blood. He imagined blood falling from blood red eyes, streaking over where his mouth should be and passing his almost nonexistent lips. Tom Marvolo Riddle would pay for trying to kill others without reason. Harry would give up his life for his old teacher’s equally nice wife at a moment’s notice. If Voldemort ever tried to kill her, there would be no lack of killing intent on Harry’s side. Conversely, if Dudley ever was caught by the Voldemort, Harry would allow him to kill him. A life for a life.

Dudley had tried to kill him for no reason. He had ended up killing another man. Dudley had no reason to kill. None. At least Voldemort thought he was saving his world. At least he had a reason. _::At least your Dark Lord has a reason. He had none. None!::_

Harry cried silently, tears streaming off his face. The red covering his vision disappeared. _::Why do you make my emotions in a turmoil? I can’t carry out a conversation with you without my emotions taking over.::_ Harry stifled any sniffles and began meditating. Once he sufficiently calmed, which took a long while, he checked the paint and began on the second layer. He started quietly humming a song to himself, Breathe No More by Evanescence. It fit him. Did the world love him or his reflection? He bled, oh how he bled, and he breathed no more innocent air.

Riddle watched silently. _::So you can excuse the Dark Lords killing?::_

Harry sighed. _::I can understand. In his twisted mind, he truly believes he is saving the wizarding world. My cousin only wanted to be rid of me and my freakishness. One day, the world will be rid of him, and I cannot wait until Dudley is gone. I cannot excuse his killing. Tom, however, is trying to protect wizards. What he needs to realize is that they are safe from muggles now, and that he is only making it worse on the wizards by creating a war.::_

_::Why do you call him Tom or the Dark Lord, but not his name? At least, not without flinching. I thought you were supposed to be one of the few people who could say his name at all, and one of the two who could say it without flinching.::_

Harry sighed. Really, who would expect a snake to pick up on that? He had called him Voldemort once or twice in Riddle’s presence, but he flinched almost imperceptibly every time he did. _::I can’t say his name without some pain. It gets worse the closer I get to him. My theory is the scar bonds me to him, sort of, and whatever feelings we have for each other is reflected through that bond. Saying his name opens the bond and helps me read him. Right now, we are opposing each other, and he was feeling negative emotions, so it hurt worse. I figured out a neat little trick though.::_ Harry grinned. _:: The forecast for today’s muggle killings and the mood of Voldemort-::_ Harry paused to interpret. It hurt, but not as bad as earlier. He was definitely getting flashes of curiosity and anger. _::Low muggle killings, probably instances of minion torturing. He is currently studying, or receiving new information. His anger is being tempered by his curiosity.::_

There was awe and anger in Riddles voice. _::You can tell all that? What about his privacy? Can you use it to spy on him? How much does it hurt?::_

Harry looked thoughtful and made sure his answers were correct before he started answering. Really, the snake was extremely eager looking, waiting for the answer. _::I had to guess that. All I could get was curiosity, anger, and a sense of new information. I know him well enough to bet my prediction is 80% accurate. I am not seeing anything, so I don’t feel I’m invading his privacy, though it wouldn’t bother me if I was. He infiltrated my dreams, the most private part of our brains where we try to understand  our life through our subconscious! I can’t use it to spy on him per say, just guess when the next attack is. It normally hurts a decent amount. I would compare it to…banging your head on a cement wall. Trust me, not fun. I did it far too often last year. I would be touched by your apparent concern for me, but it’s obvious your just worried about your Voldemort.::_ Harry flinched at his deliberate use of his arch foe’s name. He felt anger, continued curiosity, a slight bit of…fear(?) and…guilt? A minute portion of the last two, to be sure, but they were there. Harry felt bad for the minion or book in sight. He did not respond well to fear, lashing out at others, if Harry’s visions were anything to go by.

Harry got up, and Riddle said nothing, knowing Harry was correct. Harry put up another layer of paint and started talking again. _::Really, it’s annoying putting on another layer of paint because your cousin still writes on the walls like a little kid………::_ Harry brushed more, his attempt to lighten the mood having failed miserably. _::Well, if it makes you feel any better, I have some good news on the Dark Lord. I don’t know if it’s good or bad for me, but for you it’s definitely good.::_ Harry paused. _::He’s regaining his sanity.::_

Riddle looked shocked. Again. Harry grinned. Really, he had not expected saving the snake and talking to it to be this much fun. The look on its face whenever it was shocked was priceless. _::What do you mean by that? The Dark Lord is insane?::_ Harry could hear anger rising up in the snakes voice. Ooh, apparently he didn’t like that insinuation.

_::Unfortunately, yes. He was insane. I could feel it whenever I was trapped in his mind. I think that contributes to some of the random muggle killings. Not all of them had a point, and neither did the excessive needless torture. Don’t worry though. He is regaining his sanity. He should be able to appreciate his life more, and think more clearly. His planning and war efforts will definitely improve now that the haze clouding his mind is mostly gone. Not that he wasn’t good at planning before, mind you. It’s just going to be even harder to win the war now, if we even can._

_His sanity has been returning slowly since his resurrection. Well, it wasn’t really working that well in the beginning and he was completely mad. That’s one of the reasons he lay low during my fifth year of school, last year. At the end of the year, I was tricked into coming to the ministry and inadvertently killing several order members and-::_ Harry swallowed and tried not to sob. _::My godfather, Sirius.::_ Harry began breathing slowly as he laid the paintbrush aside, done with his task. _::Tom came to the ministry. We encountered each other. I could barely think through all the pain shooting through my scar. Dumbledore appeared and started fighting him. Tom decided to defend himself. By throwing himself in me, in a way.::_ Harry shuddered, almost breaking through the feeling of calm meditation brought him. _::Th-the pain when he entered my body was-tremendous. I have felt the cruciatus, and I do not exaggerate when I say it felt like several of them focused on my scar, my heart, my soul, and my head.::_ Harry shuddered again.

_::He overshadowed my body and attempted to get Dumbledore to kill me to get rid of him. Even through the pain, I saw Dumbledore considering it. A smile was spreading on his face as if it was his dream come true, before a troubled expression crossed it. I saw it, and recognized what it meant. He was going to sacrifice me soon, and a complication that had crossed his mind saved my life. I felt sheer terror, and with strength born due to desperation, I tried flinging Tom out of my head. I felt his shock and surprise-his every thought was clear. I saw his madness, and in my panicked state, I thought it might help save me if I tried to remove that madness. Before I threw him out of my mind, I cut through the fog the madness caused, providing Tom with a way to break free of his madness. I think it worked, and he saw Dumbledore’s look. He actually helped in my efforts of getting him out of my mind. Before he left, I noticed the pain had dimmed, partly proportionate with his insanity. That’s another thing I think causes me pain through the bond, his insanity. Partly, at least._

_Luckily for us, Dumbledore was halted in his plans by the arrival of the ministry. You should have seen the minister’s face as he stared at his broken atrium, the Dark Lord, Albus Dumbledore, and me. I think he was shocked be the atrium most of all though.::_ Harry grinned and laughed in slight disbelief. _::I swear the Dark Lord saw that and destroyed the atrium even more. Several statues and columns exploded before he left. Honestly, if I wasn’t exhausted and fighting against him, I would have cheered right then. I hate the ministry, especially after all of their lies. Anyways, the point of that was that the contact with my mind and my help started tearing apart his madness, I believe. So, like I said, good news for you and any other supporter of his, and bad news for Dumbledore.::_

Harry stood and decided to let the snake think on that. He was trying to be nice and not say anything against his Dark Lord. He wasn’t going to lie for it, no way, but he decided it was best to keep on good terms with the snake. There was no reason to annoy his new- friend, could he say that? Yes, the snake was his friend now. No one he ranted at and explained things like that to couldn’t be anything less than a friend.

Harry decided to test his newfound magical prowess and concentrated on drying the wall. After he felt his magic take hold after a few minutes, he grinned in success and started hauling Dudley’s stuff into the room. After he finished, he left Dudley’s room to go shower. He explained where he was going to the snake before going to wash the paint smell off and take advantage of the Dursleys not being there.

Harry sighed as he turned on the hot water and burnt the paint smell out of his skin and pondered the snake he had named Riddle. The snake clearly was a fully-fledged supporter of Voldemort. He was so interested in whenever Harry started talking about him that “tell me now” vibes practically flowed off him. Occasionally Harry felt like the snake was thinking of killing him. He saw the ruby red eyes lock on him, and it seemed as if death itself was residing in his eyes.  Harry shivered, a cold chill crossing over him. Yet the snake was smart, and had realized that he had to rely on Harry if he wanted to survive. The moment Harry’s usefulness ended, it would be up to the relationship with the snake, which meant he shouldn’t say anything bad about Voldemort. Yet there seemed to be a reluctance to want to kill, as the snake had no need to keep him calm or explain things, or even talk to him. It was a riddle as to whether the snake actually wanted to kill him or not. Either way, Harry was more likely to live, but he still had to be careful. No threatening the snake or in any way harming it.

Harry turned off the shower and toweled dry, making sure to avoid looking at his reflection. He was vain enough not to want to see the scars in his chest. He dressed slowly, and then headed towards his room where he had left Riddle.

 _::I don’t know about you,::_ Harry hissed, _::but I’m in the mood for turning in early. I need to conserve energy since I didn’t get supper. Oh, speaking of eating, are you still full from the rodents you ate the other day? I don’t know how much snakes need to eat exactly...::_

Riddle shifted as Harry lay down so that he would not be crushed, then crawled and lay his body over Harry’s. _::I just need several mice a week and things like that. I had a large meal yesterday, so I should be sated for a while.::_

Harry hummed an agreement. He lay drifting off to sleep thinking of lost and regained sanity as the Dursleys entered downstairs. He paid them no mind and slowly felt himself succumb to slumber, his body searching for rest to recover.

Riddle stayed awake longer, listening to the Dursleys crash through the house. The noises made him hiss quietly in annoyance as they distracted him from his thoughts. He contemplated things lost and gained, and finally fell to a fragile sleep as the discord downstairs continued long into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, thanks again for reading, and I hope you will see a new update here by next week!  
> Original chapter published: July 23, 2010   
> Words: 5,477 w/o authors notes, 5,755 with.  
> Pages: 11 w/ Bookman Old Style size 11 font  
> Updated November 29, 2010  
>  Words: 5,555 story only


	4. Dumbledore and Presents

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of this chapter is rather odd. Just wait, it will be explained.  
> Disclaimer: Oh yes, I have been writing for years, Harry Potter is all mi-wait, what? You already know it's owned by JK Rowling? Curses, my evil plan is foiled. Stop laughing! Shut up already! Cruel people...

** Abandoned to the Cold **

** 4 **

~\/~

-^- Dumbledore and Presents ^-^

~/\~

That night was a difficult night. At around 3:00 in the morning, Harry began jerking and thrashing in his sleep. Riddle was quickly shaken from his slumber and hissed at him, to no effect. Harry never heard him, and began to cry softly. He began mouthing words, whispering them so quietly that only Riddle’s extra sensitive ears picked up the sound. His face made it appear as if he was shouting the words that were barely uttered, and even asleep terror filled his face. Terror, and an unbearable look of sadness and hate. The hate was so profound that anyone could pity the one on the receiving end, the one at fault for all of his nightmares. Harry believed this to be none other than-himself.

“No-no no no no…Sirius! No, don’t follow-don’t come-don’t fall-no…no! Shouldn’t have come-shouldn’t-wouldn’t-did-no…Sirius! Damn it-STOP! Don’t follow! I’m here to save you, you can’t-no! My fault, all my fault! Mine, mine, mine, my fault, all mine, not Sirius, no no no no…” Harry fell silent, but he kept jerking. For a minute he calmed, and then he began shaking, violent tremors that nearly threw Riddle of his bed.

“Stop it-stop it! Cedric! No, don’t! I told him-I did-he died-NO! Not a spare!” Silence. Then Harry’s voice went flat, like he was telling a story. “Yes sir, that’s right.  He killed Cedric. Yes sir, it was my fault-why? You told me, I told him to come, and he died for that. Yes sir, it was Wormtail, the rat. He owes me a life debt? Really sir? He had a baby, broken and bleeding, so sad, so disgusting, so helpless-oh no. Nono nono. Not him. He’s dead. Just a spirit. It was just dreams. Nonono-” Harry was hyperventilating before his voice turned dead once more.  “Yes sir, it was real. I was knocked out and put on a headstone. It’s cold. Cauldrons came. Bone broke free from the ground like dust. The traitors arm was torn off with a knife. Flesh, bone, and-blood?” Harry’s voice rose. “No. Nonono-not me, not me, not me, me! My arm- it was cut. My blood bled into the cauldron-the waters swirling-the babies put in- drown, don’t drown, drown, drown, drown. No! He’s rising, he’s ascending, he’s coming out of the cauldron-” Harry’s voice died again. No note of emotion could be heard. “Yes sir, it was him. It’s Lord Voldemort. He’s white, so pale, so wraith-like, is he really alive? Oh yes, he is, oh no, no. He’s calling them-it burns! I screamed, yes sir. Why? It hurt. Oh, it hurts, oh nonono…Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle, Nott, McNair…here, here! Others too, yes! Yes sir! I couldn’t tell, couldn’t see, all covered in black with white-”

Harry started panicking again. His thrashing, which had died down with the tone of his voice, started again, panicky and incredulous. “Oh no, he’s looking at me, he’s looking at me!!! Nonononono-duel? He just told me to duel him? Is he off his rocker? I can barely see through the pain, my wand! Where is it, where is it, where where where? Mine! Wormtail released me, and the Death Eaters surrounded-nonono, don’t surround us! Let me out! I tried, they threw me back. Bow? Why would I-oh. It’s a dueling rule, really? Don’t make me against my will! I will stand against you!” Harry’s voice lost its determined tone and sounded curious instead. “Yes sir, he tried and failed, is it that important? Nuisance? Me? But-” Harry’s breath hitched and turned scared, yet determined again. “RUN! Dodge, dodge, Imperiod! I should listen, but I don’t want to. It’s bad. No, I won’t-I won’t! Ha, beat you again-no, I’m trapped! What to do-only one dueling spell I know.” Harry’s voice changed again, to be empty of all emotion. “I jumped from behind the tombstone, shouted  just as he did. Our spells met- Expelliarmus red and Avada Kedavra green- turned phoenix gold.

Our wands were connected, and there was this cage, all golden and protective-yes sir, it did surround us. We floated off the ground, away from the Death Eaters. There was a dot of light in the middle. It was approaching me. I sensed danger and forced it back to Voldemort.” There was no flinch when Harry spoke his name. “Yes sir, of course I managed! He was scared of losing, I wasn’t, so I won. Ced-” Harry’s voice broke. “Cedric came out.” Harry starts shaking. “He said it’s not my fault. But it is! It’s my fault-of course, professor.” Harry’s voice took on the same hypnotized tone it had been in earlier.” You are always right. It was all my fault. No one else’s. Then came some lady, then my- my-“ Harry shuddered and started crying silently. “My parents came out, told me how brave I was.” Harry’s voice fell again. “No, professor. I know I’m not brave, just a heroic idiot. Yes professor, I know others die for me so I can live. Of course. But they told me to run, so I did. I grabbed Cedric’s body, it was the least I could do, and made it to the Portkey. Then I landed back in front of you, and you know the rest, professor.”

Harry was silent for a moment. Riddle entertained the hope he had fallen asleep so he could think about what he had just said. He had no such luck. “Don’t worry professor, I know. Others die for me. I’m not brave, I’m a foolish Gryffindor. Yes, I beat Riddle and then I die. Or I die defeating Riddle. I understand. Yes, sir. Whatever you-” Harry choked on his voice. “No, professor, no, no, no no no. You’re wrong, you’re wrong, you’re lying, no no no! I know I need to die, but my friends will be with me! They won’t betray me! I’m not entirely worthless!” Harry’s voice turned pleading. “They know me! They won’t turn their back on me! Hermione won’t! He won’t! Ron did, though-“ Harry’s voice broke. “Of course. You’re right. I need to give them everything before they betray me. You need my gold, sir? For an order of some sort? Of course. Yes sir, yes sir, yes sir-” Harry’s voice was quieting. “I don’t want to, yes sir, yes sir, yes sir…”

Riddle watched as Harry fell back into a disturbed slumber as he committed the words to memory. He pondered over this new revelation.

  
`-_-``-_-``-_-``-_-``-_-``-_-`

Harry woke the next morning with a groan. He had had another horrible dream last night, but like the many before it, he could only remember the begging and some vague ideas afterwords. Sirius falling through the veil, Cedric being killed by Wormtail, and a horrible feeling of emptiness of knowing no one would ever like you and that everyone who got close to you would die. That it was all his fault they were dead. Of this, the dreams left no doubt. The feeling Harry got was so horrible he didn’t know if he would ever be able to kill anything again, not even a slug for potions class.

After a few minutes of panicked and heavy breathing, Harry managed to calm his mind through meditation. He let his feelings drop away, the feelings of self-loathing and worthlessness. He let pride, humiliation, happiness, sadness, anger, and laughter fall away until he could think and make accurate decisions. When he was like this, Harry knew he could put aside any personal grudges or favors and judge situations and people accurately. Like this, Harry knew he was as close to impartial to all unimportant things as he could be.

Riddle watched until Harry lay peacefully near him once more. _::You know, you had a horrible dream last night. You could have warned me you were a horrible sleep talker.::_

Harry shrugged. _::Sorry, I didn’t think about it. All of my dorm mates know I silence my bed so I don’t disturb them. At least, I think they know. I started screaming in my sleep years ago. I did it occasionally times during my third year and my second, after the whole Chamber of Secrets mess, but it didn’t happen that often. My schoolwork suffered the next day, but nobody ever asked about it, so I just ignored it. In my fifth year, I had them at least once every other week. At the beginning of the semester, I asked my charms professor about a silencing charm and learned to cast it. Neville had asked about my health before, but after he didn’t hear any more nightmares, he dropped it._

 _By the end of the school year, they were at least once a week, more often twice a week. I’m just glad I’m better at potions than Snape thinks I am and that the Room of Requirement can turn into a potions lab. I spent time in there and brewed the necessary potions to keep me awake and healthy. I tried Dreamless Sleep several times, but it doesn’t work that well.::_ Harry shrugged again. _::I can use it one night and it will work, but barely, and I can’t use it again for another week for it to have any effect. The nightmares have just grown to be a part of my life. Until I mastered meditation, that is. I don’t have the dreams as often when I meditate, or I guess you could say,::_ Harry laughed bitterly, _::Occlude.::_

Harry gently moved the snake off his stomach and made to get up. He frowned, noticing his room was darker than usual. He glanced at the window, and seeing the sun was nowhere near rising yet, he groaned. He concentrated for a moment, then attempted to cast a wandless Tempus charm. After several unsuccessful tries and a hissing snake, he got it to work.4:45 am. ‘Great. Not only do I have a horrible dream, I wake up early and in a foul mood. I wish I knew why-the dreams can’t be that bad, can they? Of course, I don’t know, as I don’t remember them…but I do talk about them.’ _::Hey, Riddle, what did I say in my sleep?::_

Riddle eyed Harry before answering. _::Why? Don’t you remember?::_ Harry shook his head in a no. Riddle muttered, _::I thought not.::_ He paused for a moment. Harry wondered why, and why he had thought that. He hoped he would get an answer soon-he hated not knowing. He hated it worse than he hated Snape. Which, actually, he did less than last year. After seeing the pensieve, Harry had been inclined to leave him alone, and the Professor had returned the favor. Mostly. He still picked on Harry in class, but he couldn’t do it as much as he had in potions because Harry absolutely excelled in Defense.

 _::In the beginning, you started crying out for something ‘serious’ and Cedric. After some screaming and thrashing about, you quieted. You started going on about the Dark Lord’s rebirthing ritual.::_ Harry’s breath caught in his throat. What? He didn’t remember that from his dream! _::In between righteous panicking, you sounded as if you were talking to a Professor.::_ Harry stopped breathing. _::You…you kept deferring to him, saying yes sir.::_ ‘No chance of it being Professor Snape then,’ thought Harry distractedly. _::You explained all that happened, and told him of all that happened until you portkeyed back. You said he knew what happened from there.::_

Harry was forced to start breathing again. He did not gasp, as his lungs told him to, but drew short, shallow, silent breaths. He got a bad feeling. A very bad, **_bad_** feeling about what happened next. _::Did- did I say anything…else? Or mention…a name?::_

The snake stayed quiet for a minute. Then he sighed, a decision apparently made, and continued. _::Yes. You- well, you acknowledged that everybody died for you. That you ‘weren’t brave, just a foolish Gryffindor’, I think you said. Then, you said that…that you would die after defeating Voldemort, or die defeating him. Then you started panicking, claiming your friends wouldn’t leave you, before apparently listening to whatever the Professor said and agreeing that they would turn your backs on you, and that you were entirely worthless. You seemed convinced to give them everything before they betrayed you. The professor needed gold, for some kind of order you said, and you agreed to give it to him-::_

Riddle broke off as Harry rose and punched the wall. The one leading outside, that now had a nice new hole in it. _::Shit, Potter, what was that!?::_

Harry ignored him and tried to keep himself calm. It wasn’t working very well. He leaned against the wall as he collected his thoughts. He was remembering his dream, as if an outside force telling him about them was the key. Flashes of sitting in Dumbledore’s office whipped through his mind. He gritted his teeth. There was no doubt now as to what happened. ‘Damn Dumbledore. He needs to die. Painfully, and then go to hell for what he’s done.’ The broken fragments of memories came back to Harry. He was ready to blow something up. Violently. Not some wishy-washy hot air balloon blown up. Nuclear bomb explosion blow up. Preferably over the headmasters office.

Harry tried to reign in his anger. ‘Meditate. Meditate. No thoughts of killing Dumbledore.  Breathe deeply. Meditate. Clear-no, calm the mind. Push out thoughts of killing Dumbledore. No killing Dumbledore or his Order of Living Barbecue. Barbecue. Chicken Wings. Anything but killing Dumbledore. Not yet, maybe later, but not now. Think of- of fire. Watching it flicker and burn. Burning away other thoughts, leaving his mind clear and calm.’ Harry’s breath came easily. ‘Clear and calm. Burned clean, impurities burnt to ashes and scattered out of his mind. Ok, I can think rationally know. I know I can. I just have to admit it to myself.’ _::I think I know what you are talking about. I-::_ Harry broke off and cleared his throat. _::Memory blocks are falling, several of them, and I mostly remember that now._

_Dumbledore-the Professor- he was the one in the dream. After I escaped from Voldemort and after we cornered Crouch, he sat down and put me under a potion he had. It-it makes the victim fall into a trance. It’s like the Veritiserum, except you deal with the subconscious as well. You can implant suggestions and demand the truth from the one under it. With it, you can make the most confident person doubting yourself, and a selfless person cruel, or at least plant those ideas. I think it’s best used for magnifying traits though. Making a sad person horribly depressed, encouraging a hero complex, increasing self reliance and lack of trust in abused, stuff like that. But Dumbledore used that on me to get me to describe stuff and plant ideas of shame, worthlessness, a need to prove myself, and to die with Riddle. I’m regaining my memory of it, as he obliviated me after. That’s the beauty of it. Obliviate locks it in your subconscious and obliviates it from your conscious mind. But since it’s in your subconscious, you remember the feelings he wants you to. Ingenious._

_I don’t think that’s the only time Dumbledore’s obliviated me either. I’m remembering other circumstances, other suggestions. Basically, they all followed the same idea. Tell me what happened, don’t trust others but me, give me money, die with Tom. Simple as hell. The same hell he will burn in when I can force him in. If I have to die doing it, I will destroy Dumbledore’s world. There is no way I would forgive him for this. Not in the least because he was trying to kill me! What else can you call convincing me to die but killing me?::_

Harry would have raged more, but the sun caught his eye. He groaned, cut off his rant, and told Riddle he was going downstairs. He left Riddle on the bed to think as he went down to cater to the Dursleys. He cast a wandless tempus again before going down, and groaned realizing it was already 5:45. He had spent an hour getting angry at Dumbledore and calming down. He bet that the calming down part had taken a lot longer. Sure, he had expected something a little like this before, but realizing your headmaster was trying to get you killed was not a happy  ‘Eureka!’ moment.

Harry reached the kitchen and pulled out eggs for omelets. The whole carton of them. 6 for Dudley, 5 for Vernon, and 1 for Petunia. He scrambled in the milk, cheese, and magic before putting it in the pan. Harry grinned. One thing was going right- he had greater control over his magic than yesterday. His day would be beating free for the mist part.

Harry barely finished the food and set it on the table before his relatives made it down. He dodged a random punch from Dudley while waiting to hear his chore of the day.

Petunia looked up from her eggs. She spoke in a sickeningly sweet tone, cloying with pathetic affection. “Diddykins, don’t hurt your hand on that nasty boys head. We wouldn’t want my precious pumpkin to get injurered!” Her tone instantly changed to a snap. “Freak, today you will wrap Dudders presents. Every single one will be wrapped perfectly.” Her voice changed back. “I want everything to be perfect on Duddidums special Christmas!” Her voice turned threatening. Harry sighed. Really, she was pathetic. “Don’t you sigh and roll your eyes at me, you ungrateful little freak! All the stuff is in the garage. You know what to do.” She turned back to her food, taking tiny and delicate bites, studiously ignoring Harry.

Harry refrained from rolling his eyes only because it would have gotten him a painful ‘lesson’ in manners. He had not enjoyed the last one. Instead, he bowed his head, said quietly but clearly, (no mumbling allowed in this house, boy!) “Yes, ma’am. Of course, Aunt Petunia.” Feeling like a house elf, he backed out of the room and out of the Dursleys sight.

Harry debated for a moment at getting the snake or not. He sighed, and decided to take the risk of getting caught. Hurrying, he willed for his magic to make him silent as he ran to his room, leaping lightly over the squeaky step. He arrived, breathless, in front of his bed and Riddle.

_::Do you want to come with me again? I will be wrapping presents in the garage today. I won’t be back until late.::_

Harry waited with his arm out to where the snake could reach. He sighed, and slithered onto Harry without further ado. Harry enjoyed the sensation of silky scales sliding against his skin. He shivered as Riddle arranged himself around Harry’s neck, remembering his death threats again. ‘Bow to death, Harry.’ He shivered again, remembering Voldemort’s cold, high tones.

He walked out of his room and quietly shut the door behind him, watching for random Dursleys. Seeing none, he silently made his way to the garage. Mentally preparing himself, he opened the door and walked in.

Just as he remembered, by the end of the season the garage was quite full. It became the storage area for all the presents the Dursleys had bought for each other. Thanks to Petunia’s nagging and Harry’s constant sorting, there were three different piles. Or rather, two piles and one miniscule mountain.

Harry snorted at the sight of Dudley’s presents. He pulled out the wrapping paper and tape and began wrapping presents without further ado. Riddle glared at the heaps.

 _::Let me guess. None for you?::_ He said in a biting, sarcastic tone.

 _::Actually, you’re wrong.::_ Harry responded with a light teasing tone. _::I’m sure it doesn’t happen very often to you. Don’t worry, your just barely not wrong.::_ He walked over to a corner of the garage and pulled out a holey pair of socks and a large, smelly t-shirt. _::My Christmas presents. They are definitely being nice this year.::_ Harry examined the shirt before wrapping and labeling it. _::Yes, definitely one of the better years. Last year I got some of Dudley’s old underwear.  Definitely not something I will ever willingly wear, not now that I can buy a new pair in a side store in Hogsmeade.::_

Harry finished his presents quickly and tossed them to the side. He began with Pentunia’s pile, as it was the second smallest and the best one to be working on in case he didn’t finish until late. He had finished the second present, a new belt,when his aunt came in. She saw Harry working industrially and screeched at him for a few minutes before going back inside. Harry was impressed by her restraint. Normally she scolded him twice as long and was twice as harsh. Maybe the magic breakfast mood-changer had done even more than he thought!

After waiting a few minutes and wrapping another present, Harry decided that Petunia wasn’t coming back. _::She’ll be gone for at least an hour. We can talk freely in here. Or, maybe I can practice my magic…::_ Harry paused and grinned. _::Yes, I think I will perform the despicable m-word in the Dursley’s very own garage! To start with a silencing charm, just in case. No sound out, only sound in.::_

Harry’s wrapping slowed a little as he began his task. He started by silencing the scissors. He waited and listened for the small _snip_ sounds they let out. He focused, and accidently heated up the scissors. After a few minutes, he managed it.

 _::Alright, I think I have the idea and the way to make the magic work. I’m going to silence the entire area I’m working at, minus me. You slither inside and listen for me. If you can hear me, try to tell me that and nod. If you can’t, tell me and shake your head. If I can’t hear you, I will know it’s at least halfway working and will signal you with a thumbs up, or a thumbs down if it’s not working. Then, you come back out and we try again.::_ Riddle agreed, and Harry began throwing up silent area.

Riddle slipped in as Harry stopped wrapping. _::Did it work?::_ Harry hissed excitedly. Riddle heaved a sigh and shook his head in a no. Harry saw his tongue flick out and it looked like he was speaking, but Harry couldn’t hear it. He grinned and gave the snake a thumbs up.

After several more tries, Harry got it to work. He then reversed the experiment by throwing up a silent area and then sending Riddle to the other side of the room. It worked perfectly on the first try. Harry grinned in triumph and gestured Riddle back.

_::Awesome! Did you hear that? It worked! Now we can talk all we want and my aunt won’t hear us, or anybody else!::_

_::No, I didn’t hear that.::_ Riddle replied sarcastically, but Harry could hear a grin in his voice. _::Do you know how strong the barrier you set up is?::_

_::Umm…how easily the silent area can be broken or eavesdropped on? I don’t have a clue. Do you?::_

Riddle sighed and climbed back around Harry. No use wasting good body heat. _::Actually, yes, I do. I can sense how strong it is from here. Obviously, muggles can’t break it-::_ Harry laughed. _::-but neither can most low-level wizards. I would say…most Hogwarts students couldn’t break it. It could probably be stronger if you put more energy in it though.::_

Harry beamed. _::Really? You think so?::_ Riddle nodded. _::Awesome! I am so using this when I get back in school. For the present though, I should probably work more on the presents. It’s a large pile this year, and I need to work more if I want to finish anytime today.::_

Riddle hissed acceptance and quietly lay on Harry’s shoulder while he thought and worked. The present wrapping was simple enough it left his mind free to think about things. Right then, he was thinking about Riddle’s words. Obviously this was a very special magic snake if he could tell how strong the sound barrier was. Then there was the matter of the comparison. How would Riddle know how strong the average Hogwarts graduate was?

It took a few minutes before the answer smacked itself on Harry’s head. Of course-his owner. If he had been kept by a recent Hogwarts graduate, then he would know. Harry wanted to hit himself on the head, but refrained since the scissors were within his grasp. Idiot.

Harry finished Uncle Vernon’s presents before talking again. By that time, an hour or two had passed. Petunia had nowhere near the amount of presents Dudley had, but she still had quite a sight more than Vernon. Harry snorted and finished wrapping her few gifts. She had a small necklace from Dudley. He showed it to the snake.

_::Look at this. A cheap muggle necklace, the only thing my cousin bought for his mummy. Yet when she unwraps it, she’ll cry and thank her ‘Darling Dudders.’  I can hear her all the way in my room. Really pathetic. He doesn’t care enough to get anything else, or even anything worthwhile for her. Of course, she’ll excuse it and say he has a to small allowance or that the nasty boy probably took it or something. Woe betide me if anyone hears her. Luckily, Dudley will be to busy opening his own presents and complaining to hear her, and Vernon will just pretend to listen. He had to get most of the gifts for her. Of course, there are others from Vernon’s other families.::_

Riddle sniggered. _::Pathetic, but hilarious. Does she actually believe herself?::_

Harry shook his head sadly. _::’Fraid so. She really believes her son is the most wonderful thing. I’m not to sure what she thinks of Vernon though. It wavers somewhere between the idea that he is the perfect husband and genius, sophisticated businessman.::_ Riddle gagged. Harry laughed. _::Yeah, that’s what I think. I can’t even imagine Uncle Vernon anything remotely like either of them!::_ Harry and Riddle descended into giggles as Harry finished off Vernon’s pile.

 Harry sighed as he turned to face his next daunting task. _::Time to climb Mount Everest.::_ So saying, Harry wandlessly summoned the item at the top of the pile. _::I love magic. I really do. I don’t have to climb up there to get to the top present anymore.::_

Riddle stopped laughing, and then started again. _::I can see it now, the brave young explorer climbing to the top of a precariously balanced mountain to claim the treasure. He barely makes it back, with it wrapped up nice and shiny before the poor explorers treasure is taken away by the government under false claims.::_ Harry shared a laugh with him as he set the first present aside and summoned the next one.

They traded stories as Harry worked his way through the pile. He sighed once he reached the heavier ones, burdened by memories of nearly being crushed trying to wrap presents. ‘I’m a wizard now’ Harry reminded himself. ‘No more smothering under Dudley’s TV while you try to get it off anymore. Now I can lighten objects and make them float like a feather.

Harry gently persuaded Dudley’s new bike to float a foot off the floor as he began wrapping it. He twisted the paper, creating a small work of art, even though he knew Dudley would just rip it apart and that no one would appreciate it. Of course, he had forgotten the snake.

 _::That really is neat. You wrap well, and even the distasteful recipients of those gifts should realize this.::_ Harry grinned at the snakes praise, but he just shrugged as an answer. After he was working on another, smaller gift, he responded.

 _::I think they kind of do. Maybe a little. They seemed disgusted by the state of the wrapping at first, but after I learned, they let me have Christmas off mostly. Maybe that’s their way of saying thanks, or their idea of a Christmas present.::_ Harry made his voice sound like Santa Claus. _::You’ve been a good boy this year, so you get the present of no beatings on Christmas! Have a merry Christmas my boy! Ho-ho-ho!::_ Harry laughed the Santa laugh and then made himself sound  like an eager little kid. _::Really Santa? That’s the best present ever! No one ever did that for me before! Thank you!::_ Harry snickered.

Surprisingly, so did Riddle. _::That sounds like the meddlesome old coot Albus mixed with jolly old saint Nicholas. Tell me, was there a twinkle in that demented Santa’s eye?::_

Harry broke out in full out laughter before he composed himself. He fell apart again as his mind summoned a picture of Dumbledore in garish red robes with a horrible, florid green trim and streaks. He waved his hand, and away he flew on a throne pulled by house elves. Harry shared this vision with Riddle, and he fell apart laughing as well. Harry wondered, at the amount of laughter, if the snake had ever met Dumbledore and seen his lurid robes and was picturing anything like that turned neon red and fluorescent green like he was. Hiding a frown, he wondered how the snake knew Dumbledore’s personality and twinkle problem. Had his former owner complained about that too, or had he supported Dumbledore and Riddle sided with the opposite. There was one thing Harry did not understand though. If the owner had been so against all things dark, why did he have a snake? Was Riddle once a Christmas present? Harry shrugged off the questions and placed them in the back of his mind to mull over later.

Harry finished off the presents and began the tedious task of bringing them all into the living room under the tree. It was just before midnight when the last one had been delivered. Harry wearily climbed the stairs into his room, tired out by the wrapping, laughing, and the magic he had been performing. He had kept his silencing barrier up the entire time, and had created several layers of them to be sure they weren’t heard. He had also done a small compulsion charm of sorts on the door, which prompted Petunia to forget about Harry and go smother Dudley. It was Riddle’s idea originally, and they had dissolved into paroxysms of laughter when they heard Dudley after Petunia tried to come yell at Harry. He sounded like he was mortally embarrassed. Harry was definitely glad about that. The charm had been one of the most brilliant things he had tried that day.

Harry lay in bed with Riddle draped across his slightly grumbling stomach. He thought back to the day, and about how knowledgeable Riddle had been. He looked down at Riddle’s white form and caught sight of his blood red eyes and a terrible thought hit him. He tried desperately to avoid voicing his thought, even in his mind, and almost managed to do so before he fell asleep. His last thought was ‘what if…Riddle is Riddle, not a riddle?’

The riddle in question lay quietly on the boy and the bed, and debated mentally through the night on how he would proceed with his plans. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updated: November 28, 2010  
> Last changed: January 9, 2011  
> Words: 5,222 story only

**Author's Note:**

> Original FF.net posted: June 16, 2010  
> Original AO3 posting: September 13, 2012  
> Latest update: January 9, 2011  
> Words: 4,379 without author's notes


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